Write a letter to someone who has offended you recently:
Why oh why do you burn when I squat, when I sit, when I walk? Muscles are meant to help me move and now they torture me. Body, you had better not hurt me again or I'm going to kick some trash. I promise I'll punish you by running harder.
Noah also suggested I write to the asphalt...
You suck. Literally, you suck my knees down to greet you and it hurts. Thanks to you my knees are bruised and scarred. I hate you.